Why 3 year olds will slowly drive one insane.

A conversation we had in the car this morning.

G (after second breakfast) “Mommy. I’m hungry.”

Me: “No you aren’t. You just had donuts. And you ate a kolache and cheese at home too.”

G: (Genuine coughing)
.
.
.
(Fake coughing)

Me: “Please don’t make yourself cough.”

G: “I’m coughing because I have a tummy ache.”

Me: “No you don’t. You said you were hungry three seconds ago.”

G: (cough cough) “I need to frow up. One time, I frowed up on the couch. I’m sorry Mommy.”

Me: “You’ve never thrown up on the couch.”

G: “One time, I frowed up on the coffee table. I’m SO sorry, Mommy.”

Me: “you’ve never done that”

G: (cough cough) I need to frow up. Can I cough in a bucket?”

Me: “We don’t have a bucket in the car”

G: “I’m SO HUNGRY mommy.”

Proof I fed her:

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G: “Mommy, I’m coughing because I’m hungry. I’m sooooo hungry mommy.”

(We get home and she eats apples, cheese, crackers, peanut butter, and milk at 11 am…approximately 2.5 hours after second breakfast. She then asks for my apples.)

Winter is Coming.

Bweh heh. (nerd joke)

It’s official.

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The spectacularly dumb cardinal that assaults the frosted window in our bathroom all.day.long. is back.

I sort of love him, except at 6 am.

We buy them this…

And they just loiter around on it, occasionally whining “swiiiiing meeee!”

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But this:

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Is a pirate ship they will happily play in side by side. No whining required.

Where’s Alanis Morissette when you need her?